Chapter 2: Gifts needed by an abbot or abbess (paragraph 2)

However, it is also true that, if the flock has been unruly and disobedient and the superiors have done everything possible as shepherds to cure their vicious ways, then they will be absolved in the judgement of God and may say with the psalmist: I have not hidden your teaching in my heart; I have proclaimed your truth and the salvation you offer, but they despised and rejected me. (From para. 2 of Ch. 2 of Saint Benedict's Rule, trans. by Patrick Barry, OSB, 1997.)

I have not hidden your teaching in my heart: Meditation teaches me that the power of selfless attention can jump from heart to heart, experiencing with joy the source of divine energy within and among us.

Chapter 2:  Gifts needed by an abbot or abbess (paragraph 1)

Anyone who aspires as abbot or abbess to be superior of a monastery should always remember what is really meant by the title and fulfil in their monastic life all that is required in one holding the office of monastic superior. For it is the place of Christ that the superior is understood to hold in the monastery by having a name which belongs to Christ . . . (From para. 1 of Ch. 2 of Saint Benedict's Rule, trans. by Patrick Barry, OSB, 1997.)

If I'm to unpack what this passage might mean to me, I have to identify and abandon my false assumptions about leadership having to do with power or status. Benedict directs me to see that real leadership is about realizing the human consciousness of Jesus in my heart. In this way, I can see that Christ-like leadership expresses itself in selfless attention to the other.

Chapter 1: Four approaches to monastic life

Finally those called gyrovagues are the fourth kind of monk. They spend their whole life going round one province after another enjoying the hospitality for three or four days at a time at any sort of monastic cell or community. They are always on the move; they never settle to put down the roots of stability; it is their own will that they serve as they seek the satisfaction of their own gross appetites. They are in every way worse than the sarabaites. (Para. 4 of Ch. 1 of Saint Benedict's Rule, trans. by Patrick Barry, OSB, 1997.)

This is a pretty good description of my occasional states of mind -- often at the time of meditation -- always on the move, never settling down, serving my own will, seeking the satisfaction of my imagination, moods, fantasies. And yet St. Benedict calls me to be stable. Stability makes stillness possible. An inner silence can grow. I can simply be.

Prologue to the Rule (paragraph 8)

With all this in mind what we mean to establish is a school for the Lord's service. In the guidance we lay down to achieve this we hope to impose nothing harsh or burdensome. If, however, you find in it anything which seems rather strict, but which is demanded reasonably for the correction of vice or the preservation of love, do not let that frighten you into fleeing from the way of salvation; it is a way which is bound to seem narrow to start with. (From para. 8 of The Prologue to the Rule of Saint Benedict's Rule, trans. by Patrick Barry, OSB, 1997.)

In my experience, the mantra has been a way that seemed narrow to start with, and strict, but it proved to be demanded reasonably for the correction of egotism, and the preservation of selfless attention. Meditation is my school for the Lord's service.

Prologue to the Rule (paragraph 7)

Well then, brothers and sisters, we have questioned the Lord about who can dwell with him in his holy place and we have heard the demands he makes on such a one; we can be united with him there, only if we fulfil those demands. We must, therefore, prepare our hearts and our bodies to serve him under the guidance of holy obedience. (From para. 7 of The Prologue to the Rule of Saint Benedict's Rule, trans. by Patrick Barry, OSB, 1997.)

I long to be ever more obedient in fulfilling the demands of love to myself, to others, to God. Meditation is the most incarnational form of prayer there is, gradually integrating my heart and my body in a fitness to serve.

Prologue to The Rule (paragraph 6)

The Lord himself in the gospel teaches us the same when he says: I shall liken anyone who hears my words and carries them out in deed to one who is wise enough to build on a rock; then the floods came and the winds blew and struck that house, but it did not fall because it was built on a rock. (From para. 6 of The Prologue to The Rule of Saint Benedict's Rule, trans. by Patrick Barry, OSB, 1997.)

The practice of meditation is my rock, my twice-daily grounding throughout the tumult of my life. But during those times when my life seems mostly to reflect the tumult rather than the rock, I can still recover faith in the firm ground, I can always know what my practice is, and eventually the rock rises up to meet me.

Prologue to The Rule (paragraph 5)

And so to prepare ourselves for the journey before us let us renew our faith and set ourselves high standards by which to lead our lives. [...] Such a follower of Christ lives in reverence of him and does not take the credit for a good life but believing that all the good we do comes from the Lord, gives him the credit and thanksgiving for what his gift brings about in our hearts. (From para. 5 of The Prologue to The Rule of Saint Benedict's Rule, trans. by Patrick Barry, OSB, 1997.)

St. Benedict bids me to set out with a high standard for my life, and also to acknowledge that it is through grace that any good comes about in my heart. For me, this is realized in fidelity to meditation: Nothing to accomplish, only to be. And to remember that it is not my meditation, but God's -- that in meditation I step into the energy of love that flows continually between Jesus and the Father.