Chapter 7: The value of humility (paragraph 16)

The ninth step of humility leads us to refrain from unnecessary speech and to guard our silence by not speaking until we are addressed. (From para. 16 of Ch. 7 of Saint Benedict's Rule, trans. by Patrick Barry, OSB, 1997.)

When I refrain from the urge to speak, I have time to detach from my words, and consider that however good or right they seem they may actually be charged by my ego's attempt to gain control. I can witness how my emotions fluctuate behind my thoughts. Silence is a discipline I learn in meditation, and that bears fruit in patience and self-control, and even in compassion. 

Chapter 7: The value of humility (paragraph 15)

The eighth step of humility teaches us to do nothing which goes beyond what is approved and encouraged by the common rule of the monastery and the example of our seniors. (Paragraph 8 of Ch. 7 of Saint Benedict's Rule, trans. by Patrick Barry, OSB, 1997.)

This passage speaks to me of the paradoxical dynamic of discipline and liberty. A living rule, one that I am living, gives me structure, returns me to God, and can allow me to participate in gifts of resilience, appropriateness, and creativity.

Chapter 7: The value of humility (paragraph 14)

I was raised up high in honour but then I was humbled and overwhelmed with confusion. In the end we may learn to say: it was good for me, Lord, that you humbled me so I might learn your precepts. (From para. 14 of Ch. 7 of Saint Benedict's Rule, trans. by Patrick Barry, OSB, 1997.)

Confusion in emotional matters can lead me to make assumptions and even to get angry. My ego greatly dislikes feeling put down or rejected, and it can strike back in fear. But I'm learning that the very experience of humbling confusion can be a call, a clear call, to the cleansing work of meditation.

Chapter 7: The value of humility (paragraph 13)  

The sixth step of humility for monks or nuns is to accept without complaint really wretched and inadequate conditions so that when faced with a task of any kind they would think of themselves as poor workers not worthy of consideration and repeat to God the verse of the psalm: I am of no account and lack understanding, no better than a beast in your sight. Yet I am always in your presence. (Para. 13 of Ch. 7 of Saint Benedict's Rule, trans. by Patrick Barry, OSB, 1997.)

I think St. Benedict writes a long and harsh passage to describe what is actually a liberating situation: detachment and selfless service -- a poverty made grand by the presence of God.

Chapter 7: The value of humility (paragraph 12)

The fifth step of humility is that we should not cover up but humbly confess to our superior or spiritual guide whatever evil thoughts come into our minds and the evil deeds we have done in secret. (From para. 12 of Ch. 7 of Saint Benedict's Rule, trans. by Patrick Barry, OSB, 1997.)

There is the secret part of my being which is the mysterious union of my uniqueness with God. But I pray that I may present to the world a transparent face, a transparent heart, because I am strong in my secret.

Chapter 7: The value of humility (paragraphs 10-11) 

The fourth step of humility is to go even further than this by readily accepting in patient and silent endurance, without thought of giving up or avoiding the issue, any hard and demanding things that may come our way in the course of that obedience, even if they include harsh impositions which are unjust. (From para 10 of ch. 7 of Saint Benedict's Rule, trans. by Patrick Barry, OSB, 1997.)

I have finally come to realize that patient and silent endurance in the face of harsh and unjust impositions is not necessarily humiliation. It's an opportunity for humility that allows me to go much deeper than reactivity, so I can face the issue in a new and more realized way. 

Chapter 7: The value of humility (paragraph 9)

The third step of humility is to submit oneself out of love of God to whatever obedience under a superior may require of us; it is the example of the Lord himself that we follow in this way, as we know from St Paul's words: he was made obedient even unto death. (Para. 9 of Ch. 7 of Saint Benedict's Rule, trans. by Patrick Barry, OSB, 1997.)

For me, the third step of humility is to accept reality -- reality as I experience it from rooting my mantra in my heart, and discovering my heart rooted in the ground of my being.