Chapter 68: The response to orders that seem impossible
If the superior after listening to this submission still insists on the original command then the junior must accept that it is the right thing and with loving confidence in the help of God obey. (From Ch. 68 of Saint Benedict's Rule, trans. by Patrick Barry, OSB, 1997.)
Simply stated, I must live each moment with this much trust in God.
“The arrogance of low self-esteem”: how that phrase hits me between the eyes, Abba! I had never thought of my feelings that I was not enough as a form of arrogance, of pride, a way for me to play God. I did not realize that my writer’s block and my perfectionism and other expressions of my feelings of inadequacy were a way of second-guessing you, my Creator. So, now, with you, I submit these few scribbles, my personal response to the Rule, a tiny seed for your garden. You give the increase. And like a child, I laugh again at how much fun we have together as I learn to play grown-up. There’s nothing that I may encounter today that you and I cannot handle together.
ReplyDeleteIn the course of this earthly journey, I a not spared of ,any difficulties along the way. There are times when I say, this or that is too big or too difficult for me ... But the yoke is not simply removed from my shoulders. These moments call for my surrender to the help and mercy of God. In fact, the big boulders that I came across in my journey are but reminders that moment by moment I have to submit in loving confidence to the providence of God.
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